the third sex

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.Taking out-of-town friends around Patpong last week, and seeing the place through the eyes of visitors, I suddenly realised how little it has changed since I first went there, when I was a schoolboy in short trousers (nearly).

The most obvious change since those far off days has been the coming of the street market. I can remember when, before the market, the street was open all night to taxis and tuk-tuks, which would cruise through looking for customers to come out of the bars with their girls.

Looking through the market the other evening, I realised that it probably earns as much for the Patpong family as the bars themselves, because I don’t think you could physically fit any more stalls into the area.

But although bars may come and bars may go, overall there never really seems to be a major change. Safari has not changed one bit in 25 years, and it has always had the best music of any of the Patpong go-go bars. I can remember back to the days when there was only one King’s Castle, rather than the three there are now.

The present-day King’s Castle 3, which of course is now ladyboys-only, was actually the first King’s Castle and was a girlie go-go bar. I used to go in there for happy hour, when I would be almost the only customer present, and I would watch the girls come in and get changed, which because of lack of space most of them had to do in the bar. It was the best free show in town.

Interestingly, the mamasan of the present-day King’s Castle 1 girlie go-go bar, just across the street from the original, is herself a ladyboy and I can remember when she was just a cashier working in the bar. I took her home and had my evil way with her and her deliciously hairy little bottom.

That was a quarter-century ago, and she has never forgotten it. Well, she wouldn’t, would she? But I always get a big smile and a wai when I see her, and although she has transformed over the years from a shy little ladyboy into a ferocious mamasan who scares all the GGs working in the bar, I’m sure she still has a heart of gold.

I’m not exactly certain when KC3 was changed from being a girlie bar into a ladyboy bar, but it would have been some time in the early 1990s. I’m also not sure if it was the first ladyboy bar, because there was another named Limelight, not far away and on the same side of the strip, which flourished during the same period. Limelite started with go-go girls but quickly ladyboy go-go dancers took over. Limelite however disappeared while KC3 flourished.

Elsewhere, many of the restaurants remain unchanged. Mizo, the Japanese-American outlet that was the first ever restaurant to open in Patpong way back in the 1950s, probably hasn’t even been decorated since that time. Tip-Top, the Thai restaurant where the go-go dancers and bar workers often go for a late meal, has recently had its interior changed but still serves good Thai food at very cheap prices.

The Derby King no longer serves the meatloaf that was my mainstay when I used to eat there regularly, but a couple of the staff are there from the early days and they remember me. Likewise at the Thai Room, where I always order Mexican Meal D, and the staff don’t even bother to ask me what I want because I have never had anything else there.

The Patpong Bookshop disappeared a decade ago and has become a music bar, which changed the appearance of that corner of the strip, but otherwise there have been no big changes on that side except for another music bar on the corner of the alley that cuts through to the multi-storey carpark.

On the other side, the pesky luggage shops have taken over some of the bars, notably the Blue Sky Boxing Bar of fond repute. But otherwise, really, it is all still recognisable. There are still a number of smaller bars, one of which offers a small short-time room just above the bar, and which I used to use frequently. You could actually look out into the street while you were on top of the lady of your choice, and see if any of your friends were walking past.

On Patpong 2, there have been very little changes. A slight rejigging of the restaurants where Bobby used to have the monopoly, but that is about all. King’s Garden, which used to be a great unofficial ladyboy venue, has become a rather more sedate music bar.

Foodland, one of Bangkok’s first ever Western-style supermarkets, is completely unchanged in appearance and layout since I first knew it. The Chinese manager has been there ever since I can remember, and greets me cordially whenever he sees me.

This is one of the great things about Patpong. To so many people, it is a big, throbbing red-light district. But underneath all the razzmatazz, it is just a village, and a friendly one at that.

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I wrote on this page recently about ladyboys who seem to have no sense of embarrassment about what clothes they wear during the daytime, and who will happily turn up at my apartment or at a hotel where I am going to photograph them looking as if they have just come off stage at the Crazy Horse.

A few days ago, a girl turned up for a shoot at 1pm in the afternoon. She was wearing a white dress with a see-through top, and no bra. You could see her nipples from 50 yards away. Bearing in mind that this is a commercial complex with crowds of office workers milling around during their lunchbreak, not to mention mothers walking their young kids around, and yours truly felt just a tad conspicuous when he went down to meet her.

This however is far from abnormal. I once met a ladyboy at a Bangkok Skytrain station, and she was bulging bra-less out of her T-shirt and wearing hotpants that advertised the fact she had a permanent hard-on. I recently walked through a hotel lobby during the early afternoon with a ladyboy whose dress hem was not long enough to cover her knickers and whose bottom cheeks were greedily observed by the bellboy right up to the moment the lift doors closed.

The other morning, an apparition materialised in the lobby of my building at noon, wearing a gold lame dress and fishnet tights. She had come straight from a successful cruise of Sukhumvit Road the previous evening and a subsequent spell in the hotel room of a Dutchman. I have driven through Pattaya in a jeep with three ladyboys who have been bra-less beneath their T-shirts and only too happy to prove it to the local lads gawping in from their pickups and motorcycles.

It doesn’t matter if I have the opportunity to issue a warning first about dressing inconspicuously. They don’t listen. The chance to have their photograph taken in seductive poses goes to their heads. There is no answer.

All I can do is adopt an expressionless expression that I hope conveys the impression that there is NOTHING ABNORMAL ABOUT THIS SITUATION, and hope that people will ignore me. As in fact they probably do, as my companion will be grabbing all the attention.

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O’s eyes opened wide and her sweet little rosebud of a mouth dropped open

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I had an email from a member during the week saying that he and his wife were coming to Bangkok and they would be looking for a ladyboy for some three-way fun. I found that a very refreshing request, somehow. I particularly liked the way in which the man’s wife is keen to find out about ladyboys, and in the fact they are both clearly intrigued by the beauty and eroticism of the third sex.

This is not the first time I’ve been asked for advice on this matter, but it doesn’t happen very often. The more usual request is from members who say they are coming to Thailand with their wives and how can they make a quick connection with a ladyboy while the missus is out shopping.

That is okay by me, and I help wherever I can. Over the years I have seen so many married couples trudging through Patpong, with the husband looking obediently straight ahead and the wife wearing a grim “I’m being very broad-minded about this but you’ll get hell from me later if I see you enjoying yourself, my hubby” expression that I’m always happy when the poor wretch makes a temporary break for it.

Although I wrote on this page the other day that ladyboys are not into other ladyboys and they are not into girls either, it is not too difficult if you go into the bars to find a ladyboy who will put on a lesbian display with a friend, or go with a male-female couple. You simply have to ask the mamasan, who will know what all of her charges are capable of doing.

From there, of course, it is up to you and the individual ladyboy. If she is in full working order, then anything should be possible. Too much hormone intake however can easily rob her of the ability to really get it up, although understanding and a little gentle coercian can often overcome this. Failing that, Viagra is easily available in Bangkok, and the offer of a tab might resolve the problem. Although, of course, if you have any qualms about offering someone medication, don’t even think about it.

But, I stress, check it out first to avoid disappointment. I remember asking Schoolgirl O if she had ever made love to a genetic girl. O’s eyes opened wide and her sweet little rosebud of a mouth dropped open.

“No!” she gasped, in much the same way she might have responded if I had asked her if she had ever assassinated a member of the Thai government.

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.Here is another story from Sergeant Shameless in which, I am sad to say, he fully lives up to his name.

“Ladyboys are like beer. The first time you have one, it tastes weird. So, you have a few more and you get hooked on the stuff.

I earned my “shameless” badge because of my wild antics with ladyboys (and ladies!). But it was not always like that. Today, I would like to tell you about my first ladyboy experience, which was not exactly fireworks but opened the door into a new experience realm (and not just sexual experience).

Like many a farang, I had been going to Bangkok to indulge in two-girl body massages, beer counter blowjobs, Thermae longtimes, and, for a while, even had a proper Thai real lady girlfriend (who made more money than me). Like many a straight farang, I openly dismissed ladyboys as gayish freaks-of-nature and cringed at the thought of inadvertently hooking up with one of the totally passable post-ops.

Yet, at the same time I could not help but be intrigued by the ladyboys. In my forays into Nana Plaza, I used to stare across from the now-closed Woodstock at the Casanova ladyboys, and eventually was enticed into their bar. In those days, they would openly play with their cocks and mine and shove their plastic tits on my face to lick. But, in the end, I would pay for a couple of lady drinks and leave alone. (more…)

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. . . . . . . …Dee: A bit bashful

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.Ladyboys are not into other ladyboys. I have only ever known of a couple of genuine ladyboy “lesbian” relationships, because ladyboys consider themselves female and they are into guys, not other ladyboys or for that matter, girls.

Fixing up a ladyboy lesbian shoot is therefore not always that easy. Some will do it simply because you ask, and that’s okay by me. But getting any real combustion going when you are taking the shots is something else entirely.

A while back I set up a shoot with Bea. I wanted to take some pictures of her with Toffee, but Toffee and she are roommates and therefore friends, and both nearly died of embarrassment when it came to the action.

Then I asked Bea if she would do it again with another friend, and she said she couldn’t do it with people she knew. A stranger would be okay. So I brought along Dee, and the two sat in my apartment and eyed each other up rather warily, then I took them off somewhere else and the shoot went okay. But it was pure sex - the kissing and hugging I also wanted to capture just didn’t happen.

A similar thing happened when I got Talisha and Jessica together. Again, these were roommates. They also happened to be the two of the most spectacularly endowed ladyboys on the Bangkok scene. They were happy to pose for the camera, and there was a little sex play, but play was all it was. Nonetheless, I was really happy with the set. With those two ladies, it would have been difficult to go wrong.

This shyness extends to ladyboys seeing each other naked. When I took Pat’s photos recently, she was terrified that her two friends Cherie and Ann, who had come with her, would catch a glimpse of her undressed. The door had to be firmly shut all the time.

However, I next did a shoot of Cherie, who is one of my favourite models. She isn’t so shy. Halfway through she went prancing out into the room totally nude, much to the amusement of the other two. She had a red feather boa, and danced around the room and out onto the balcony with the thing wrapped around her gorgeous little body. I found the whole episode very erotic, and Cherie clearly enjoyed herself.

But then the other day I did a video shoot of Dee, another girl who has a spectacular cock. On this occasion I brought along my maid’s son Ek, a fledgling ladyboy, to handle the video lights. I dressed Dee in a college girl’s uniform, and got busy with the video camera.

As the shoot progressed, I got more and more annoyed by the fact that Dee was covering up her dick with her hand. Then I turned round, and realised that Ek was standing behind me, admiring Dee’s erection. I couldn’t bundle him out of the room, because he was there to shift the lights around.

In the end, I lost my patience with Dee. Look, I said, this is a movie. I am trying to film your cock. How do you expect me to do it if you keep covering the f*@!&*g thing up?

“Sorry,” she said “I very shy.”

I got the video done in the end, but I had to throw away an awful lot of footage when I was editing the thing.

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