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Archive for October, 2010

Crossing the boundary

captain outrageous, ladyboy nong

Not that long ago, I was sitting at one of Patpong’s outdoor bars, idly
contemplating a gorgeous ladyboy standing a few yards away trying to drum up business for a neighbouring bar. I knew her well, biblically as well as being a friend. Her name was Mel. We had enjoyed some good times together.

A British man came along and sat down next to me at the bar. I could sense he was eyeing Mel up. And she certainly was an eyeful. Tall, curvy, beautiful skin, impeccable makeup. He turned in my direction. “She really is quite something, isn’t she?” he said.

I couldn’t resist it. “Not bad for a feller,” I commented.

I heard a dull clunk as his jaw hit the ground. “NO!!” he said. “You don’t mean….” And he began spluttering in his beer. “Who would have thought it possible?” he said.

At that point, if you are totally straight and have only ever had sex with genetic girls, and only ever wanted to have sex with genetic girls, you can cross a boundary into unknown territory and find out a little more about the world and about yourself too.
captain outrageous, ladyboy nong
I knew all about Mel’s long, elegant dick and her sweet little bottom and her soft little tits. I knew that she was a real sweetheart, and that being with her, even if you had done everything you could do and were simply sprawled out reading a book, was a pleasure. In other words, she was a classic example of the third sex.

I waited to see if the British visitor rose to the bait. I saw Mel glance in my direction, smile, and then turn a sunny smile upon the visitor. I sensed him shift on his bar stool. He drained his beer and paid his chit. He got to his feet.

Then he walked away in the opposite direction.

He didn’t know what he was missing.

Take your pick

captain outrageous, ladyboy nong

I have just come back to Bangkok from a three-week overseas trip, and having been without any ladyboy company for such a long period of time I called one of my favourite ladyboy friends and asked her to come round and see me that same evening.

She duly turned up, and I instantly peeled her clothes off until she stood there wearing nothing but a smile.  I gazed at her, suddenly overawed by her beauty. She is very slender and very pale-skinned, with prominent nipples, one of the cutest bottoms I have ever seen and a cute little dick that springs into action if you so much as look at it.

At that moment, if I had my ladyboy friend and an identical genetic girl standing side-by-side, I would have chosen without hesitation the ladyboy.

It’s at moments like this that you realise just how sensual a ladyboy can be.  I still love women, and I still look at girls all the time. I don’t like men, and the idea of having sex with an adult male is as yukky to me as it is to any completely straight guy.
captain outrageous, ladyboy nong

The ladyboy is an exotic, erotic creature. A Thai friend of mine, a man who is content with his wife but who sometimes has sex with ladyboys, says there is an explosive element to it. “It’s a very potent mix of chemicals and heat,” he said. “Plus, there is something of the forbidden about it.”

As for me, I would find it very hard to exist without them. Three weeks away from ladyboy company was pretty tough – I travel a lot, but I’m usually away for only a week at a time, which is survivable. Just about.

Picture this

A friend of mine was in town during the summer break. A Brit who lives in Hong Kong and who is a journalist, he had come to Thailand to visit a monastery that holds a regular fair devoted to the art of tattooing. He doesn’t speak Thai, and he was travelling alone. Wandering around the fair, watching the tattoo artists plying their trade on the large number of Thai men who thronged the grounds, he gratefully accepted the offer of a seat from one of the stallholders.

He thought something might be amiss when it was indicated that he might like to take off his shirt, and this was confirmed when the tattoo needle began pricking into his back. To cut the story short, he now has a beautiful Buddhist tattoo between his shoulder blades. You’re not even a Buddhist, I told him, when he showed me. It would have made more sense if you had had a pair of tits tattooed on your back, or the Manchester United badge. That would be more in keeping with your religion.

tattoo“Har har har,” he replied. “I’ll have you know this is an entry-level Buddhist tattoo, and now I can have any other tattoo I like. I could even make myself bullet-proof with the appropriate tattoo.”

Thais have always, throughout their history, taken tattooing very seriously. Time and time again, I will be photographing a ladyboy and I will see a tattoo: very often a tiny, personal little tattoo such as a small swastika on the inside of the right ankle, a tiny T-shaped mark or character on one of the fingers, or a more elaborate religious symbol on an arm or the back.

Very often these are not particularly aesthetic: some of them look as if they were done with a biro. Others however are very fine little pieces of artwork, and I wonder what their significance is – my knowledge of Thai not being good enough to understand metaphysical matters, for these tattoos do have a spiritual significance.

tattooThen again, there is the fashion for pictorial Western-style tattoos. This started to become evident in Bangkok a decade or so ago. Now of course there are tattoo artists everywhere. This style of tattoo has become popular amongst ladyboys, and some of them seem to regard themselves as a living canvas.

I frequently discover a large tattoo on a shoulder blade when I am taking photographs. Dragons are an especial favourite. My very dear friend Ice, who appears on the main site many times, has a swirling dragon pattern running horizontally across the base of her spine. I was really depressed when I saw she had had that done, because she has a most beautiful bum and to my mind that ugly bruise-coloured tattoo detracts from it.

Prize for the ladyboy with the most tattoos goes to Apple, also on the site in two sets. tattooI have known Apple for more years than I care to remember, and for quite a while we had a steamy affair going. She was a gorgeous girl. Then she went off the rails a bit, and I lost track of her. When she re-emerged a couple of years ago, she had become The Amazing Illustrated Lady. Much as I love her, I find it all pretty off-putting.

Anyway, I have resolved to have the official Thai name for Bangkok tattooed on my willy. The longest place-name in the world, it is: Krung Thep Mahanakhon Amon Rattanakosin Mahinthara Yuthaya Mahadilok Phop Noppharat Ratchathani Burirom Udomratchaniwet Mahasathan Amon Phiman Awatan Sathit Sakkathattiya Witsanukam Prasit.

It would, of course, only become completely visible when I am looking at a ladyboy.

Down home girl

captain outrageous, ladyboy dai

Early last week I had a call from Dai, who appears on the main site in a couple of sets, and who I have known for about 10 years. In fact she was one of the handful of models I photographed for a test run when I first started taking ladyboy pictures, so that shows you how long I have known her. A year ago Dai had moved back to her home province of Sakorn Nakhorn, in Issan. I had kept up with her by occasional phone call, as she is a good friend and I thoroughly enjoy her company. But I hadn’t seen her in that time.
Now, she said, she was going to be in Bangkok for the weekend, following a sad trip she had to make to Chiang Mai for the funeral of a friend. I met up with her on Sunday, and she really hasn’t changed much physically over the years, even though she is nearing 30. I thought I would mention all this because many people ask me what happens to ladyboys as they get older, and it is not that often I can come up with specific cases.
Dai had worked for all the time I knew her as a cashier in King’s Castle I, in Patpong. She wasn’t really part of the ladyboy scene, and the bar is of course a girlie go-go bar. Her job was shepherding visitors to their seats, getting in the drinks, taking the money. One of the foot soldiers of Patpong. Although a naturally good looking person, with very fine bone structure and pale skin, and with a good working knowledge of English, she has always been hopelessly lacking in confidence. Just a natural shyness, which actually is one of the reasons I have always liked her so much.
captain outrageous, ladyboy dai

But after 10 years working in the same bar, she had had enough. I think there were other pressures, too, maybe from home. Whatever, Dai had suddenly decided she wanted out from Patpong and she headed back to Sakorn Nakhorn.
Meeting up with her on Sunday night, I asked her what she was doing now.
“I help my mother. She sell fruit in the market.”
What, in the town or the village?
“In the town. My family is from the town.”
Do you have a boyfriend?
“No. Have friends to go out and enjoy myself but no boyfriend. Thai men always trouble.”
Are you bored?
“No. I always miss my home and my town. Bangkok very big, cannot live well without a lot of money. And in Patpong I work every night, only have two or three nights off each month. Work late, so sleep in the morning. Then go to work about five o’clock. So not really have much time to enjoy.”
What about later? What will you do in 10 years time?
“I don’t know! But now everything is okay. The market good place to work, have many friends there, my mum is okay she not very old. Maybe later we have shop. But I live at my home, very comfortable, not like small room when I worked in Patpong.”
captain outrageous, ladyboy dai

As Dai talked, I realised that she was simply the home-loving type. She had no need to be in a live-in relationship with anyone, because she is basically a self-contained person who enjoys the company of a few friends and her family. She has never been ambitious, because if she was she would not have worked in the same bar for 10 years. She has never been a flamboyant ladyboy: the only clothes I have ever seen her wear are jeans and T-shirts. She wears very little makeup, because her skin is pale and doesn’t take heavy colouring very well. She is not the over-effeminate, gossiping type of ladyboy. She takes no hormones, as they disagree with her. She had a boob job done a few years ago, but it is a good quality one and has settled in naturally. The lack of hormones means that her dick, one of the most physically beautiful I have ever seen, has retained its shape and potency. 
She is the natural melding of boy and girl that I find so attractive. A long time ago, she told me that she knew from the age of eight that she would be a ladyboy, and she has simply grown up with a female mentality.
In some ways, Dai is a classic case of what happens to a ladyboy when they decide to leave the scene. Most ladyboys have their roots in the provinces. Returning to the peaceful town or village where they spent their formative years must be very attractive to many, because let’s face it, the Bangkok ladyboy lifestyle must be a mind-bending experience.  The opportunity to be back amongst family and friends, to open a small business, even to sell fruit and flowers in the local market must be like balm to a soul that has been seriously tested for too many years. 

Into the mainstream

captain outrageous, ladyboy aob

I was in Laos last week. I had gone up into the mountains for a couple of days, where it was pouring with rain, and then I came back to Vientiane, where it was also pouring with rain. Well, it is the rainy season.

Vientiane is a nice place in any kind of weather, a town so small you can get around it on foot, and with very little traffic.  I sploshed about in the streets for a bit, then went back to the hotel. The rain  had  managed to wash out the building’s  internet  system, so I left my laptop in the room and went down to the business centre  in the hope that  it was only the in-room  connection that was suffering.

To my great surprise, the girl on the business centre desk was a ladyboy. To ordinary mortals, she would have appeared a genetic girl, neatly dolled up in a businesslike jacket and skirt and with her hair primly fastened back. But with my super-sensitive ladyboy vision, I knew. And she knew I knew.

No, I didn’t have my evil way with her across the desk. I’m sorry to disappoint you. But this did make me realise how even Laos is changing in its attitude towards the third sex. The country is very gentle, very friendly and very welcoming but it is still, ostensibly at least, Commie. It is not, in theory, big on what it sees as Western decadence.
captain outrageous, ladyboy aob

You can find girls easily enough in Vientiane, and also boys. Ladyboys are more difficult, but a tuk-tuk driver would take you to a bar where you could find a few. But as to ladyboys working in a mainstream business, that is something I have never seen before in Laos.

There was not the opportunity to find out more from the lady behind the desk. Another staff member was in the room, and there were a couple of guests. And I was checking out that evening. So I’ll just have to go back next time I’m there, probably within the next two months, and see if she is still around.